A few years ago my husband asked me why I had so many cruddy undies. This could have meant a multitude of things. I panicked and started thinking was there a hole I didn't notice or worse, did I not use enough NapiSan the previous month!
I asked “What do you mean by cruddy?”. He replied “All your undies are beige”. I informed him the correct term is nude. It’s the perfect non-colour for under any piece of clothing. Then he said “There’s nothing sexy about nude knickers”.
At this point I wanted to punch him! I snapped back “I buy everyone’s undies in the house, I look for specials at Target and Best & Less. Why do the colour of my undies even matter? Would you rather me spend $20 on a pair from a lingerie shop?” To that he simply replied “Yes”.
Then it hit me, like a ton of nappies.
What happened to my pre-baby days of colourful matching lace pieces?
When had I let my sexy-self disappear, into a drawer of entirely boring bras and knickers?
I remember still wearing my maternity bras for too long after I finished breast-feeding. It seemed mummy underwear had invaded my wardrobe. I pretty much opened the drawer and invited them in, they were the perfect combination of comfort and practicality.
However, I was determined to reinvent my underwear. After breast-feeding three children I could no longer be perky and braless. With minimal bust elasticity, I needed a full cup with underwire and a whole lot of strap support!
I made a commitment to remove my mummy underwear!
I wanted to feel sexy again, not just for my husband but for me.
If you have let practicality and comfort take over your underwear drawer, check out my tips to getting your sexy back!
I highly recommend going alone without the children. There is nothing worse than being completely naked and your child escaping under the change room door. I’m speaking from experience, this actually happened to me.
After children your boobs can change size and shape. Head to a store that can professionally fit you. Myer and Bras N Things give expert bra fittings for free.
Watch out for undies that are too small. When it comes to knickers buy one size bigger than your pant size. This helps to prevent an undie muffin top.
Wear your favourite colours whether they are red, blue or pink. With most clothing especially darker colours like black or navy you can wear any colour underneath. It’s good to have ONE or TWO nude bras and knickers for under white clothing (just don’t go overboard like I did).
Often we keep our underwear well past it’s used by date. Ideally it’s great if you can get new lingerie every 6 months worst case 12 months. My Grandma was onto something giving us undies each year for Christmas.
If you have any tips about buying underwear, please share them in the comments.
For many women shopping is an escape, just like fishing is for men. It is seen as a leisurely activity, a chance to relax and socialise with friends. Afterwards men lie about the size of the fish; women lie about the price of the dress. For both sexes, most trips end in disappointment. Surprisingly though, whether you love it or hate it, you keep going back for more. You’re hoping for the catch of the day, that elusive one in a million piece that makes you feel like you rule the world.
While fishing men may tackle sharks, get their fingers caught in hooks or become stranded in the middle of nowhere, but what women face is far worse…
Do you rule your wardrobe or does your wardrobe rule you?
As a personal stylist I have seen every type of wardrobe you can imagine. Over the years I noticed a familiar pattern with all of them. I discovered there are three main types of wardrobes. The size has no effect and some people's wardrobes can be in between. Which one are you?
Have you ever experienced extreme self-doubt and fear?
I had this happen to me recently. I have a hard time saying no to things and when I was asked to take part in The Great Debate, without thinking I said Yes. The Great Debate raises money for charity. It’s not a real debate more of a comedy debate where the debaters dress up as characters and tell inappropriate jokes. If you make the crowd laugh the audience will put money in your team’s bucket. This year all the money went to Yaps. If you would like to donate to Yaps you can do so here: www.yaps.org.au/donations/
After months of practice the date was suddenly upon us. Two days before the event I woke up petrified, I had a complete meltdown. I was scared no-one would laugh, I would forget my lines, fall off the stage and make a complete fool out of myself.
Even though I regularly do public speaking, I do not consider myself a comedian or actor. I psyched myself out, it was the first time in my life I developed stage fright.
I was so anxious, I started thinking what would happen if I was really sick, had a car accident or jumped on the next plane out of town. Surely my coach would be able to play my part.
After a few supportive phone calls from the coaches, fellow team mates and past debaters I was convinced it was too late to pull out and the show must go on. The only thing left to do was focus on my character. What would she do if no-one laughed, she forgot her lines or fell off the stage.
For the next two days I practiced her walk, her voice, her timing. I recited my lines in front of the mirror, in my car and while I cooked dinner. (My poor husband and kids!)
The day of the debate arrived and I was calm (or exhausted from waking up at 3am and practicing in my lounge room until 5am). By 9am I was actually excited I wanted the audience to be entertained, I wanted Yaps to benefit and I wanted to get the whole thing over with so I could start drinking champagne.
As I walked into the room full of 200 smiling faces I felt the love and encouragement, everyone wanted us to do well and was on our side. I think most people were pretty happy it was us on that stage not them.
I was the fourth debater, after hearing from The Virgin Mary, The Devil and Cruella De’Vil the time to face my fear had arrived. My character was an innocent looking nun until her black cloak was removed and underneath was a naughty nun outfit complete with fishnet stockings and suspenders. Having the costume helped me to become my character, I wore a blonde wig so the nun looked even less like me.
The hours of immense fear I had experienced faded away and in less than 5 mins I had done it! People laughed (some told me till they cried), I remembered all my lines and I didn’t fall off the stage! Once I sat down I felt as though I had conquered a mountain, I was elated. The adrenalin rush was incredible.
We all play a variety of characters in our lives, wives, mothers, employees, business owners. When you make a conscious effort to dress for the part it’s empowering. Clothing allows us to express ourselves and our character to the world, whatever we choose it to be.
The whole experience made me realise that we often self-sabotage when we are on the verge of greatness. In the end the naughty nun saved me from myself.
For Mother’s Day this year I decided to giveaway an awesome makeover to a deserving mum. Choosing a winner for a makeover is no easy feat, there were countless entries and everyone that entered was so deserving. To be honest every mum I know deserves a makeover! However, I could only pick one. There was one mum, Jo who stood out. Instead of listing all the reasons why she deserved a makeover, she simply wrote “I could do with a bit of special”.
I was aware that a few years ago Jo’s daughter Xanthe was diagnosed with Leukemia.
Our daughters were in the same grade at the same school. As a mother to three healthy children, I couldn’t even begin to understand what Jo and Xanthe had gone through. I made the heartfelt decision that Jo would be the winner, she deserved a ‘lot’ of special.
Jo was so excited when I announced she had won, in fact Jo said she has been a big fan of mine for a long time. She even admitted to having one of my decade old articles pinned to the inside of her cupboard door. (Unexpected and flattering at the same time haha).
Our styling session began like most, with Jo explaining all the reasons why her style was the way it was. It wasn’t great, it wasn’t bad, it was somewhere in between. Jo explained to me how on the 26th of January 2011 (Australia Day) was a day she’d never forget. The hospital phoned and said Xanthe is very ill, pack your bags for three months, you are both on the next flight to the Royal Children’s Hospital in Brisbane.
I’m incensed at the recent body shaming incident involving Playboy model Dani Mathers. Dani took a photo of a naked women in a gym bathroom and posted it on social media with the caption "If I can't unsee this then you can't either."
Dani’s joke backfired and she is now rightly being vilified for what she calls “an accident”. Unsurprisingly she now has a life ban from the gym L.A Fitness.
This upsets me on so many levels. Not only was it a breach of privacy but morally it was a disgusting thing to do. It pains me knowing that this happens on a daily basis in particularly to women.
Creating an authentically dressed you!
Why is a powerful question, I always ask my clients ‘why’, particularly when going through their wardrobe. Why did you choose this piece of clothing? The most popular replies are; “It fit”, “The sales assistant liked it”, “I was desperate” or my favourite “It was on sale”.
Why you choose the clothing you do, determines the outcome of your overall look. If you buy things ‘just because’, your wardrobe will end up a mix of mismatched, uninspiring pieces. This leads to resentment of your wardrobe, and sometimes yourself. It’s easy to blame your body when the clothes don’t fit but remember, it’s always the clothes fault! No wonders so many women begin to loath shopping. For many it ends up feeling like a depressing chore.
How Not to Fear the Camera
Do you feel awkward being photographed? Do you avoid having being in photos whenever possible? Does the thought of being tagged online in a photo make you cringe?
Before I discovered the tricks to getting a good shot I used to despise having my photo taken. My dislike for being in front of the camera started on school photo days! Due to my shortness I was always placed in the front row. For me it felt like they may as well put a sign on my head saying ‘shorty’. (At least the sign would have made me look taller!)
Seven Style Mistakes Mums Make
Like most mums, my first priority is my children. Mother guilt plays a huge role in my life and trying to balance work and family life is a constant struggle. As a mother to three teenagers and step-mother to three adult children, I’m good at putting myself last. In the past by not taking the time to look after me, I unknowingly made many fashion faux pas including some of the ones listed below.
Mistake #1 Wearing active wear all day (especially if you never exercise!)
Gym gear has its place in every wardrobe but it should not be made up entirely of active wear. It might be easy and comfortable but it's far from stylish.
The simple solution is to have a shower and get changed after your morning gym session. The added bonus is you won’t be walking around the rest of the day smelling sweaty. Alternatively if you are due to go to the gym later in the day take your active wear with you and get changed when you arrive.
Personal stylist, image expert, speaker, fashion consultant & style blogger.
Join the style tribe!!!
Join to recieve a free guide to finding your personal style!