For many women shopping is an escape, just like fishing is for men. It is seen as a leisurely activity, a chance to relax and socialise with friends. Afterwards men lie about the size of the fish; women lie about the price of the dress. For both sexes, most trips end in disappointment. Surprisingly though, whether you love it or hate it, you keep going back for more. You’re hoping for the catch of the day, that elusive one in a million piece that makes you feel like you rule the world.
While fishing men may tackle sharks, get their fingers caught in hooks or become stranded in the middle of nowhere, but what women face is far worse…
There are sharks in the shops
As soon as you walk in to a store you have to put up with being attack by overbearing shop assistants who won’t leave you alone, continuously hunting you like a school of piranhas. Then there are the catfish who try to bait you, tell you that you look great in everything, which you know is a complete lie. Or there’s the ones who want nothing to do with you, they swim away when you approach, pretending they didn’t see you. They’d rather be on the phone or talking to other staff members. Then there’s the sharks circling, telling you about the latest sales in an effort to get you to spend more so they reach their monthly target.
Changing room hazards
Security tags are made to deter shoplifters however these little hard plastic devices have the power to render someone unconscious or leave you with tetanus. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard someone yell out in pain after one has clonked them on the head. What’s worse is when they come apart and the needle that holds them together stabs you in the hip. That’s when you somehow manage to jam your fingers in the change room door. It was probably the fact you were pissed off and slammed door shut after trying on the 10th pair of ill-fitting pants.
Alone and vulnerable
There is nothing quite like the fear of being alone in the change room and getting completely stuck in a dress. Maybe you mistakenly put your head through the arm hole, or thought you could squeeze into a smaller size, or perhaps you didn’t notice the stupid invisible side zip. Those side zips are a danger on their own. After continually getting stuck, you manage to finally yank it up really quick then it catches on your delicate skin and causes you to bleed. After all that you decide you don’t like the dress anymore and throw it back on the hook.
It’s no wonder a third of women despise shopping! Men will never know the struggle.
"Gerlinda made me feel comfortable in my own skin, I feel less judgement towards my body. I've already saved so much money avoiding the mistakes I used to make. I'm inspired to buy fashion again, and buy clothing I know I'll wear. Gerlinda really listened to me and was able to find items that were perfect for my lifestyle. This was over and above getting a new wardrobe, I love getting dressed each day!
Massage, Meditation and Hypnobirthing specialist
"Gerlinda is incredible! She knows her stuff and is passionate, she is amazingly capable at guiding you into a new look before you even realise it. I now know how to shop for me and since working with Gerlinda, no longer make fashion faux pas!"
Sally Mlikota - Owner of CBC Staff and previous president of the CBWC