Recently I was in a room full of women and when asked the question, "Who here completely loves their body?" I was the only person to raise my hand.
Most women have a list of things they don't like or parts they think need changing. I’m too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short. I don’t like my arms, my legs, my nose, my boobs, my thighs, my wrinkles.
During the birth of my second child, a nurse refused to give me pain relief because according to her “All mothers should experience the full agony of childbirth, that’s what makes you a woman”. WTF!!!
The messages I received about my body were loud and clear:
If you want to be a woman, be strong not bossy, be gentle not weak, weigh this, eat that, do this, buy that and then you’ll be happy because you’ll finally be perfect.
In my youth I spent so much time loathing a body that society taught me to hate. Transforming my outsides didn’t change who I was on the inside. It just kept me focused on the external.
I fell victim to the comparison game at a young at and would constantly compare myself to other girls. I wished for a different shaped face, nose, body, eye colour, skin tone, I just didn't want to be me.
At age 16 after directing so much hate towards my body in particular my boobs, I believe the negative thoughts resulted in the manifestation of a benign (thank God) breast lump. It was the size of a golf ball and needed to be removed by surgery. This made me reassess my relationship to my boobs, my body and myself.
Most of the things I didn’t like were based on my genetics; this body is a gift of survival from my ancestors. My body is a miracle. From creation to birth, no-one told my body how to grow. The infinite intelligence inside of me does the work without my input; My heart beats, my lungs breath, my stomach digests, when I’m injured my body works to heal it. When I choose to put poison in my body like alcohol, it works to detoxify it.
Everything outside of me asks me do more, be more, as if I’m not already doing enough. I am enough, I’m not broken, I don’t need fixing, I don’t have to do anything other than be me because I am a miracle and so are you.
You’re beautiful. You’re loved. You’re perfect just the way you are.
Love your body, appreciate your body, talk kindly to your body.
“Body I know I don’t tell you often enough how amazing you are, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you”.
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Massage, Meditation and Hypnobirthing specialist
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Sally Mlikota - Owner of CBC Staff and previous president of the CBWC